Monday, 3 October 2011

Sexual kinks, fetishes and desire

If you've arrived here through looking at the followers of other blogs then you'll already have a good idea what my kinks are. And let's face it it's unlikely that you'll have found this blog from any other source, so let's dispense with formalities and just get on with it.

I'm aroused by white women fucking black men.

There I said it. I know it's not particularly politically correct, but what can I say, when I masturbate that's my preferred choice of porn. When I fantasise about sex then that's what I see in my head. Even now, having typed that single sentence I can feel the swelling in my groin. Just the thought of searching for some interracial porn and touching my cock is distracting me from writing this. It's taking all my concentration not to wank at this precise moment.

It might not be the only thing that gets me off (I will list others in a future post), but it's the one that makes me cum the hardest. I have no idea how this fantasy came to dominate my sexual desires. Although, I can say that it wasn't an overnight discovery, it's been developing within me for many years, possible about 12 now. So you can see why I've decided to hide behind a nom de plume and why I can't share this with my friends.

Porn, in various forms, has played a key part in my sexual development from an early age. I grew up in the countryside in a small community without many girls. I also went to an all-boy school so contact with the fairer sex was rare. However, I recall having sexual thoughts and dreams 6 or 7 years of age, they centred around a girl in a dungeon whom I 'rescued'. There was always some touching in these dreams but no sexual activity as I know it today. Despite this I still consider them to be of an overtly sexual nature. A little later, I started to get erections and I would dance around my room watching my cock wobble in front of me. I touched my cock, but I didn't masturbate. That discover came when I was about 13/14.

Cue puberty and I have all these hormones coursing through my body. I discovered masturbation through some comments from a friend at school. I was in a metalwork class and we were washing our hands at the end of the session. My friend made a comment at how the soap looked like spunk. I faked knowledge of what he was saying but maybe he twigged that I was in the dark. So he made the international wanking movement and squirted the soap out of his hands, like an ejaculation. Intrigued by this, I wondered what would happen if I did that with my cock.

Later that night in bed, I touched my cock. Gripping it in my right hand, I imitated my friends movements at school. Within a short time, I explode, the spunk shooting in the air and disappeared (it possibly hit the ceiling, the ejaculation was that powerful). That was my first orgasm and masturbation quickly became a routine.

Somehow, I was drawn to pictures of women - it seemed the natural thing to do. The only source of material I had was my mother's Marshall Ward home-shopping catalogues and in particular the lingerie section. I remember one catalogue had a full-page photograph of a model in just a pair of knickers and no bra. Her breasts were beautiful. That became my preferred image and shaped my style of masturbation for years to come.

My routine was always followed the same path. Wait until my mother and younger sister were out, then I would grab the catalogue from under my parents' bed, dash into the bathroom and kneel. By now I was familiar with the spunk shooting from my penis, so I placed a neat pattern of toilet tissues on the floor in front of me. Then I would masturbate. Usually, I would achieve five or six orgasms in about 30 minutes. I lusted over that woman in the catalogue. Once, I shot my spunk too far and doused her pretty face and breast with with jism.

This carried on until the day I found two copies of Mayfair (a British softcore porn magazine). They were lying in the middle of the road. No one was around, so I picked them up and carried them off. Carefully hidden in my room, these became my preferred wanking material, until I had the courage to buy my own magazines.

The content was as you would expect, mostly white women posing nude with almost visible (hairy) vaginas and short stories detailing sexual acts between a man and a woman. Straightforward and fairly tame by today's internet standards. Nothing you would think that would lead to the desires that I have today. When I bought my first hardcore video, it again featured white couples.

The first interracial image I saw came many years later via the internet. I was perusing a website dedicated to amateur models when I saw the image that might changed my life for ever. It was a poorly taken photo of a white woman, lying on her back and blindfolded, a black man was kneeling over here. You couldn't see much of him, just his large cock, and the cum that he'd just shot over her slightly open mouth. Some sperm was running down her cheek on to the pillow. She was gripping the base of his penis. I've since lost the image, but just thinking about it still makes my cock hard.

After that, curiosity compelled me to seek out more images and eventually videos. Now the majority of the videos feature black on white.

That's a long post, but I wanted to give you a little background to sexual identity.

Living life in a black and white world.



  1. My first view of porn was a stolen copy of Hustler that was in my friends club house, with a women dressed as a dentist, and another in a short skirt and guarders. Next page, they were both in lacy underthings, tongue kissing and posing on the dentist chair. I think this shaped my sexuality by giving me my first thought of two women together. And there's nothing better than some good old fashioned girl on girl action!!